From the Frontlines of Fabulosity

Top 10 Things to Do This Fall

webmaster@utterlyfabulousnetwork.com (Fab Female) — Wed, 11 Oct 2006 14:59:00 +0000

It's officially October, which means it's time to stop crying over the end of summer and start celebrating Fall. That in mind, here are the top 10 ways to embrace Autumn:

10. Get lost in a corn maze
9. Try a seasonal flavor at Starbucks (Maple Macchiato sounds delicious!)
8. Rake the leaves... and then jump in them!
7. Have a friend over for hot apple cider and gossip
6. Fill your home with the fragrance of fall; keep a pot of water and cinnamon boiling on the stovetop or buy some fall-scented candles
5. Go get a pumpkin milkshake--Artic Circle has a delicious one
4. Watch a high school football game
3. Decorate your home with deliciously soft blankets, textured throw pillows, and seasonal foliage
2. Warm apple crisp with a scoop of French vanilla. Reheating a frozen crisp counts!
1. Take a drive to see the changing colors in your town or city. Pack a fall-themed picnic basket and enjoy the refreshing crispness in the air!

Squawk Boxes

webmaster@utterlyfabulousnetwork.com (Fab Female) — Wed, 02 Aug 2006 21:54:00 +0000

This article from the New York Observer is neither new or fresh, but it is interesting. If you're sick of overgrown sorority girls ending their sentences with inflections instead of owning their thoughts by making declarative statements, you'll enjoy this piece. However, if you follow through on the final premise that this linguistic development could be a positive sign of freshness and viability--not to mention the comparison of Caesar's army to today's army of skanks (20 points for the Mean Girls reference), it kind of makes you want to kill yourself, so read with caution: City Girl Squawk.

Statler, Waldorf, and Elton John

webmaster@utterlyfabulousnetwork.com (Fab Female) — Wed, 02 Aug 2006 21:49:00 +0000

More proof that Elton John is becoming just another crotchety old man: he's ripping on "American bands" because he doesn't like their style. In a giant step backwards from breaking down gay stereotypes, John noted that he loves the glam rock look, essentially saying that he wishes American rock bands would drag it up a little. I do have to concur with him that nose rings and excessive tattoos (Tommy Lee, I'm looking at your horribly disfigured self) aren't exciting and aren't attractive. However, I can't get behind the idea that more bands should start sounding and looking the same, just in a different and tired way. Elton, retire to the balcony to boo with your fellow Muppets!

Ready for More?

webmaster@utterlyfabulousnetwork.com (Fab Female) — Tue, 01 Aug 2006 21:15:00 +0000

Just when you thought it was safe, I'm back. Apologies for the month-long break with no warning, but I've completed a big move and am almost fully adjusted and ready to get back in the gossipy saddle.

Claire Danes Turning into Gwenyth Paltrow

webmaster@utterlyfabulousnetwork.com (Fab Female) — Mon, 26 Jun 2006 21:15:00 +0000

I'm not sure whether it's evolution or devolution, but it clearly looks like Claire Danes is morphing into Gwenyth Paltrow here. If the two had their genes spliced, I'm sure this is what the product would be. Except that if you combined the two, you'd expect their fashion IQ to increase, not decrease. Sorry, Claire--I can't get behind this morose yet beautifully cut dress.

What a Wonderful World

webmaster@utterlyfabulousnetwork.com (Fab Female) — Sun, 25 Jun 2006 17:13:00 +0000

The world is not going to hell in a handbasket after all. The world's second richest man, Warren Buffet, announced that he giving away his fortune. From a man that's worth $40 billion, this is huge. And before you start wondering how you can get ahold of some of the dough, consider this: the bulk of the real estate tycoon's cash will be going to the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation, which funds efforts to cure worldwide diseases such as HIV/AIDS and malaria, as well as other causes, such as libraries and schools. If the two richest people in the world are committed to philanthropy, there's hope for all of us.

Richardson Leaves the Backstreet Who?

webmaster@utterlyfabulousnetwork.com (Fab Female) — Sun, 25 Jun 2006 02:26:00 +0000

At 33, Kevin Richardson is finally moving on from being a Boy. The news broke today that the oldest member of the Backstreet Boys is leaving the formerly ubiquitous boy band. Wait--stop the presses! This is huge news! The Backstreet Boys are still around?!? I had no idea!

Yeah, kudos to Kev for having the chutzpah to get the hell off that train wreck before he was pigeonholed forever as part of the boy band craze. (Wait a minute...) Now he can move on to his true goal: to be pigenholed forever as the guy with huge eyebrows. :)

Black Is the New Blonde

webmaster@utterlyfabulousnetwork.com (Fab Female) — Sat, 24 Jun 2006 02:41:00 +0000

First Britney Spears dyes her hair black, and now Paris Hilton is running around in a black wig. New trend? Could be, except that the color isn't flattering on either of them... You can check out the pics at The Superficial--one of the most mean-spirited laugh-fests on the Web.

Comedy Central Saves Futurama's Ass

webmaster@utterlyfabulousnetwork.com (Fab Female) — Fri, 23 Jun 2006 16:18:00 +0000

If you're a Matt Groening fan, today is a banner day! Futurama is back, and the new episodes will be aired on Comedy Central. It's only fair, considering that continual reruns of Futurama have been aired on the network for years--virtually since the show's demise in 2003. Either way, the re-run phenomenon worked magic again, stirring interest and maintaining and developing a regular fan base. Like Famiily Guy, execs were able to find a viable interest in a cancelled show via late night cable junkies. The result? More Fry, Leela, and Bender--what's not to love?

Xenedrine: As Smart as a Five Year Old

webmaster@utterlyfabulousnetwork.com (Fab Female) — Thu, 22 Jun 2006 05:07:00 +0000

I just saw what I think is about the most horrific commercial in recent memory. Xenedrine, an unregulated weight loss supplement, has decided that a dude dressed as a bottle of the pills and calling me "Fatty Fatty McFatson" (or something similar) is the key to getting people to buy. I get that it's supposed to be silly, funny, and if I'm being generous, charmingly post-modern. The bottom line? As much as I'd like to lose a few pounds, I don't like being insulted. Take a clue from Weight Watchers, who is having incredible success with their most recent community-oriented, women-friendly promos. That commercial makes me want to say one thing to Xenedrine: "I'm not but you are! No takebacks!" Ad execs, please grow up!

Sean Donnelly on Passions? What?!

webmaster@utterlyfabulousnetwork.com (Fab Female) — Wed, 21 Jun 2006 22:08:38 +0000

Okay, so I catch Passions every once a while. So shoot me. It's terrible and the plotlines haven't advanced in over five years--that's not the point. Having caught the last five minutes of Passions today, I discovered something incredibly disturbing: General Hospital's Sean Donnelly is on Passions! What? Robert Scorpio, Anna Devane, Luke Spencer, and Holly Whatshername are all back, and Sean Donnelly is left to rot on Passions? Where's the justice? Somebody report this to the WSB!

Kiera Knightley's Saucy InStyle Cover

webmaster@utterlyfabulousnetwork.com (Fab Female) — Wed, 21 Jun 2006 03:39:00 +0000

As one of the most beautiful women in the world, it's no surprise that Kiera Knightley is on the cover of July's issue of InStyle. What's surprising is that they picked this shot in particular. Is it me or does she look weird with the one raised eyebrow? It looks like she's either mildly amused by the whole photo shoot or telling the photographer, "You want me to what?" For the record, this is also the look I give celebrity photographers when they ask me to spill secrets on Johnny Depp...

Yeah, But Who Killed Laura Palmer?

webmaster@utterlyfabulousnetwork.com (Fab Female) — Wed, 21 Jun 2006 03:34:00 +0000

In a recent conversation about good shows that haven't gone to DVD yet, Twin Peaks came up. The first season was released--years ago. But what about the rest of the crazy David Lynch fun? While the show did get measurably more incomprehensible as the episodes went by, it was always entertaining and always left the viewer curious about what twist was going to throw everything off balance next! To the gods of DVDs, please accept my offering of cherry pie and a damn good cup of coffee and release the final seasons of Twin Peaks!

Screech Is Broke. And?

webmaster@utterlyfabulousnetwork.com (Fab Female) — Mon, 19 Jun 2006 05:23:30 +0000

Saved by the Bell gossip, my guilty pleasure, has been flying around lately. After the mini maelstrom regarding Lark Voorhies' alleged drug abuse (or non-abuse, rather), now it's Dustin Diamond's turn. The broke former Saved by the Bell star is selling t-shirts to save him from foreclosure. T-shirts? Don't you think Screech would be able to come up with something more creative? Where's Zack Morris when you need him? Either way, I think most fans don't want to publicize their secret SBTB obsession. How about a more stealthy way of supporting Bayside High's favorite nerd? And just so you know, if you're one of the eight people who actually bought one of these t-shirts, I'm, um, being foreclosed on. I can sell you a shirt personally worn by me for as little as $38.99. Hey, it seems to be working for Dustin Diamond!

Britney Spears Copies Namibia Move

webmaster@utterlyfabulousnetwork.com (Fab Female) — Fri, 16 Jun 2006 18:15:56 +0000

Apparently, Britney Spears has been inquiring about having her next baby in Namibia, a la Brad and Angelina. Seems like she can't come up with any new crazy stunts to pull, so she's just riffing now. Is it just me, or is she on a path to become the next Michael Jackson? They share the common traits of pop stardom, plunging careers, questionable marriages, attempts to gain media sympathy, and general bad parenting. My next bet is that the next time her buzz wanes, she's gonna dangle her baby from a Namibian third-story.